Frank’s Rant
Welcome to the 6th floor.
Today’s contributors are: Ann, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.
Subject: Frank’s Rant
“Stupid weather! Why has it been cold, windy or rainy all week? Where’s spring and summer? Baseball has started. It’s supposed to be warm. I’m tired of jackets!”
“Well April showers bring May flowers!”
“And I care about flowers? Are there natural flowers on this island anyway? It’s all concrete. Everything that grows is planted and watered and cultivated!”
“What do May flowers bring?”
Tabitha and Billy together: “Pilgrims!”
“You guys are dorks.”
“Everything’s so dreary. The economy sucks, I somehow owe money to the government, I haven’t been able to sleep in days and I haven’t had a date in a month!”
“Maybe you should try keeping more normal hours. I can’t imagine it’s easy to meet women at four am.”
“Not the cheap kind anyway, if you know what I mean.” Scott winks.
“Actually, that probably is the cheap ones. I’d imagine the higher priced ones have already found a client by then, not looking for the first drunk guy to stumble out of a bar.”
“I’m not that desperate anyway! Screw them and their diseases! Wake up at the crack of dawn like Sara? Not for me! Maybe I need to take a trip somewhere. Get out of the city, connect with nature.”
“Maybe you just need some fresh air, and some outside stimulation. But let me know if you go somewhere. I worry.”
“Yes, I know you worry. I’ll keep you updated. Maybe I should make a twitter account and update it constantly so you know exactly where I am at all times!”
“Or we could install a GPS tracking device on you.”
“Perfect. I’ll get right on that. Maybe I’ll just get it implanted into my shoulder. Fine, fresh air. I’m going for a walk. We have an umbrella right? Oh, I see it there drying from when Ann came in. I’m borrowing it. Talk to you later.” Frank takes the umbrella and leaves.
“That was quite a rant.”
Tags: april showers, baseball, cold, flowers, gps, hookers, jokes, may flowers, rain, rant, twitter, umbrella, weather, wind
Rest Stops
Welcome to the 6th floor.
Today’s contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank
Subject: Rest Stops
“I’ve got to use the bathroom. Can we pull off here?” Sara asks, as they near a rest stop on the thruway.
“Sure. I’m getting hungry anyway, we can get some food here.”
“Wake up Ann!” Sara says, nudging Ann.
“We’re there?”
“No sleepyhead. Just a rest stop, food and bathroom break.”
“Oh..okay. I guess that late night shift I took last night might’ve been a bad idea.”
Ann and Sara head to the bathroom and Frank heads to the store. They meet in the lobby in a couple of minutes.
“Here, one of you carry this one.” Frank says, handing Sara one of three bags.
“Yikes! How much stuff did you get?”
“Just some snacks for the ride.”
“It’s not even that far! What’s in here?” Sara asks, peaking into the bag as they head to the car.
“Beef jerky? Why do we need beef jerky?”
“I dunno. Every rest stop seems to have it though, so it must be good.”
“You’ve also got a crappy rest area mug in here. Did you really need to buy this?”
“That’s for Sara, so she doesn’t have to drink her coffee in the room out of Styrofoam.”
“Thanks..I think.”
“Two big bags of chips, one barbecue. I guess I can get on board with that…but did you really need a map of eastern Pennsylvania?”
“You never know where we’ll end up, and I don’t have a map of Pennsylvania.”
“You’ve got a GPS. All the maps are preloaded.”
“Valid point. I probably didn’t need the bag of trail mix either. I don’t even like trail mix.”
“Oh, dibs on the trail mix.”
“Hey, there are shot glasses in here too. I guess you intend on doing shots in the hotel?”
“I can so get on board with that!”
“Just have to find the liquor store when we get up there. Shouldn’t be hard, what else is there to do around there right?”
“Drink drink and more drink.”
“Cow tipping?”
“Cow tipping is more of a daytime activity. Then they retire to drink the night away.”
“Remind me why we’re going to the middle of nowhere again?”
“Got anything better to do? Now open up those chips.”
Tags: beef jerky, car trip, chips, coffee mug, cooperstown, Drinking, gps, rest stop, shot glasses, Snacks, trips, vacation