Get Up, Get Out
Welcome to the 6th floor.
Today’s contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank
Subject: Leave the Apartment!
Sara is sitting on the couch, in her pajamas, with a big mug of coffee watching tv when Ann gets home. Frank is in the kitchen warming up leftover quesadillas from dinner last night.
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“Sara..still in pjs? Have you left the apartment at all this week?” Ann asks.
“Umm..” Sara thinks. “I think I took out the garbage on Tuesday.”
“So out of the apartment for two minutes, but haven’t seen the light of day?” Ann comments.
“Outside!” Frank scoffs, “Who needs it.”
“I guess no interviews this week?” Ann asks.
“Actually, I talked to a recruiter yesterday. I may have one early next week.” Sara responds.
“So you might actually get out into the world next week.” Ann says.
“Since we’re going to go see Zombieland tomorrow night, I assume she’d make it outside this weekend.” Frank comments.
“If she still remembers how to get dressed anyway.” Ann says.
Sara sticks out her tongue at Ann.
“I don’t think they have a dress code at the theater. They’d probably let her in like that.” Frank says.
“I hope she’s showered at least. Otherwise you’re sitting next to her.” Ann says.
“I showered!” Sara says.
“It’s alright.” Frank says, ignore Sara. “We’ll put her next to Billy. He won’t smell her over the popcorn that he seems to get at every movie.”
“I don’t smell!” Sara says.
“Good idea. Unless we put Sara in the middle and have her hold the popcorn. Mask her odor.” Ann theorizes, ignoring Sara.
“Oh fine, I’ll shower.” Sara concedes, handing her coffee mug to Ann and heading to the shower.
“Well, that was pretty easy.” Ann says, dumping the coffee down the drain.
Frank gasps. “You dumped her coffee? She’ll kill you!”
“Eh. She drinks too much coffee anyway. It’s good for her to cut back.” Ann says.
Frank chuckles, “It’s your life.”
Tags: 6th Floor, Coffee, interview, job, lazy, Manhattan, movie, movie theater, nyc, odor, outside, popcorn, shower, smell, unemployment, zombieland
Bacon
Welcome to the 6th floor.
Today’s contributors are: Sara, Frank, Billy and Scott.
Subject: That Bacon Smell
Sara walks in to the apartment, it’s 8am and her nostrils are instantly assaulted with the smell of bacon.
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“Oh! This place reeks! What have you guys been doing?!” Sara exclaims.
“I’d have thought it’d be fairly obvious.” Frank replies from the kitchen.
“We’re cooking bacon!” Billy replies happily.
“You guys are seriously up at 8am just to cook some bacon?” Sara asks.
“It’s bacon!” Billy replies happily.
“Actually, I haven’t been to bed yet. I was running hot last night, all the cards were hitting and I just couldn’t turn the computer off.” Frank says.
“What were you doing out at 8am anyway? You don’t work anymore..” Billy asks.
“Oooh..is this the walk of shame?” Frank asks, looking Sara over. “Was that what you were wearing yesterday?” Frank turns to Billy. “Do you remember what she had on yesterday?”
“I wish it was as exciting as that. I just went to get coffee because I was too lazy to make it.” Sara says, hoisting her coffee cup.
“You were too lazy to make coffee, but shuffling out of the apartment, down five floors, and down the street was okay?” Billy asks, incredulous.
“I went in a daze. Getting the coffee down, filling the damn pot with water. Cleaning the pot first because I didn’t clean it yesterday..” Sara shudders.
Scott wanders in looking more than half asleep. “I smell bacon. I’ll get up for bacon. Where’s the bacon?”
“Wow. Better than an alarm clock for Scott, bacon.” Sara says.
“Just about ready Scott. Have a seat.” Frank says.
“Just about is good enough.” Scott mumbles. He walks over to the stove, snatches a piece of bacon of the griddle, hisses in pain and drops the bacon onto the counter. Scooping it onto a plate with his other hand, he takes the plate and sits down.
“Smooth one.” Sara says.
Scott just grunts.
Tags: bacon, bacon alarm clock, bacon smell, Coffee, laziness, lazy, walk of shame
What Time Is It?
Welcome to the 6th floor.
Today’s contributors are: Ann, Billy and Scott.
Subject: What Time Is It?
“I see you got your watched fixed Scott.” Ann says, indicating the watch on Scott’s wrist.
“Hmm? No, not yet.” Scott replies, as they’re walking down the street.
“Why are you still wearing it if it’s broken?”
“It’s not broken, the battery is just dead.”
“Does it tell time correctly? No, so it’s broken.”
“It’s correct twice a day.”
“Twice a day, that’s all you need out of a watch right?”
“I’m just wearing it to remind myself to get the battery replaced. Otherwise I’d have sat on my desk for weeks.”
“When did the battery die?” Billy asks, as they wait for a light to cross the street.
“Just before Christmas.”
“So weeks.”
“Frank and Sara would probably tell you not to bother, just use your cellphone.”
“And I’d say it’s a lot easier to just glance at my risk then fumble for my phone and hit a button to illuminate the screen.” Scott demonstrates, as they turn down the block to the apartment.
“I agree. However, I have always wanted a pocket watch.”
“I’d break it.”
“Well, have someone get married. Pocket watches seem like pretty standard ‘best man’ gifts.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
Tags: best man gift, cellphone, lazy, telling time, time, watch, watch battery