Welcome to the 6th floor.
Today’s contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank
Subject: Leave the Apartment!
Sara is sitting on the couch, in her pajamas, with a big mug of coffee watching tv when Ann gets home. Frank is in the kitchen warming up leftover quesadillas from dinner last night.
“Sara..still in pjs? Have you left the apartment at all this week?” Ann asks.
“Umm..” Sara thinks. “I think I took out the garbage on Tuesday.”
“So out of the apartment for two minutes, but haven’t seen the light of day?” Ann comments.
“Outside!” Frank scoffs, “Who needs it.”
“I guess no interviews this week?” Ann asks.
“Actually, I talked to a recruiter yesterday. I may have one early next week.” Sara responds.
“So you might actually get out into the world next week.” Ann says.
“Since we’re going to go see Zombieland tomorrow night, I assume she’d make it outside this weekend.” Frank comments.
“If she still remembers how to get dressed anyway.” Ann says.
Sara sticks out her tongue at Ann.
“I don’t think they have a dress code at the theater. They’d probably let her in like that.” Frank says.
“I hope she’s showered at least. Otherwise you’re sitting next to her.” Ann says.
“I showered!” Sara says.
“It’s alright.” Frank says, ignore Sara. “We’ll put her next to Billy. He won’t smell her over the popcorn that he seems to get at every movie.”
“I don’t smell!” Sara says.
“Good idea. Unless we put Sara in the middle and have her hold the popcorn. Mask her odor.” Ann theorizes, ignoring Sara.
“Oh fine, I’ll shower.” Sara concedes, handing her coffee mug to Ann and heading to the shower.
“Well, that was pretty easy.” Ann says, dumping the coffee down the drain.
Frank gasps. “You dumped her coffee? She’ll kill you!”
“Eh. She drinks too much coffee anyway. It’s good for her to cut back.” Ann says.
Frank chuckles, “It’s your life.”
Welcome to the 6th floor.
Today’s contributors are: Ann, Tabitha, Frank, and Scott.
Subject: Smells like Summer
Tabitha, Ann, Scott and Frank are in Starbucks at lunch time.
“At least it’s finally warm.”
“Summer has finally arrived, yes.”
“Still raining though. Still raining..”
“I’d rather go back to winter. You can always tell it’s summer by the way the city smells.”
“The rain is only making that worse. It smells like a swamp.”
“Soon the sunlight will start warming that stagnant water, that’s full of cigerette butts and garbage, stewing it to a beautiful New York City scent.”
“They should make candles. Like those vomit flavored Jelly Bellys. NYC Summer candles.”
“What I wouldn’t give for a whiff of that syrup smell from Jersey right now.”
“I had an apartment once, third floor, directly above the dumpsters. We couldn’t open the window in the summer at all, or the whole apartment would reek of trash. We couldn’t have an air conditioner, just four fans that we kept constantly running.”
“That sounds rather miserable. I can’t imagine you spent much time there during the day.”
“Weekends mostly. We kept ourselves well stocked in beer. Any day we spent there we pretty much ended up drunk. I remember one day when I got stuck waiting for the cable guy during the week, and he showed up at the end of his 10-2 window. He must’ve thought I was a degenerate alcoholic or something. I must have downed 10 cold ones while waiting for him.”
“I’m confused Scott, how is that different from your drinking habits nowadays?”
“Now I wouldn’t be as obviously drunk with 10 beers.”
“So all you’ve gained over these years is a bit of alcohol tolerance?”
“And a bit of a beer belly.” Tabitha says, poking Scott’s tummy.
“Hey now!” Scott says, mock insulted, “I’m not the one panicking about fitting into a dress for my cousin’s wedding!”
“That’s only because my cousin thinks you’re a creep, and didn’t invite you to the wedding.”
“Aww, I’m sorry Scott. I know how much you like to wear a nice dress.”
Frank starts laughing uncontrollably, drawing weird looks from some of the other customers.